I just got circumcised today...Spirtually...

Today my Jesus ripped some chains that I've told him repeatedly that I did not want removed. He was in pursuit for my heart and had never intended to give up. YAHWEH pierced my heart today because he made a promise a long time ago when he said that he would finish the work that he started in me.

I have fallen to deeply in love with the world again. I was too in love with dream of having my first girlfriend. I was too in love with one day getting married to a Godly woman. I was too in love with the idea of enjoying God's gift of sex and children more than I was in love with Christ - the giver of every good gift.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote a book called The Cost of Discipleship and in his book there a quote that I've memorized. He writes that, “When Christ calls a man, He bids him come and die." When I thought about my dreams I thought about how Christ did not have my whole heart and that was when I knew something needed to change. I needed God to remove my dream from my heart. I needed to ask God to make his dreams my dreams. I needed to decrease and Jesus needed to increase. There had to be none of me and all of Him.

The crazy thing was that God had started this process 3 days ago. A friend sent me a text to read Romans 2. When I read about how it is the circumcision of the heart that makes a person a true Jew - I was in my heart and my mind just declaring to the Lord Amen. I believe it was because the Holy Spirit was at work. The Holy Spirit was preparing my heart for a removal of self.

God cause my eyes to see how the world has nothing good to offer. Cause my eyes, my heart, and my mind to see, to feel, and to believe and know that it is you along who offer good and perfect gifts. Force your servant to think and to feel differently because he wants to cling onto those chains. Set him free. Amen